Mad Man with a Blue Box
by Sarpndo
Summary: The countries are arguing again. But, just as everything seems lost, the Doctor comes and tells them that he'll save the world. Short little thing I just came up with. Spoilers for Episode 4, Season 7 of Doctor Who


The World conference Room was in chaos, not that anyone was actually surprised. Although there were those who'd been hoping that something might actually be achieved, what with the crisis occurring at that very moment. Namely, everyone was dying, all of seemingly unexplainable heart attacks. And, supposedly, the heart attacks were related to the strange black cubes that showed up about a year ago. Where the black cubes came from was a complete mystery, though each country had their own ideas about it. Which was why they were fighting in the first place, besides the fact that they couldn't agree on how to handle the problem or how to fix it.

Britain was one of the loudest spoken, mainly because he had UNIT, which he claimed was the best alien organization in the world, which made someone (France) point out that he didn't even believe in aliens, which, of course, started a fight, which America had to exacerbate by saying that his MIB were the best, since he was the hero, and anyway, all alines landed in America, to which statement Japan silently disagreed. It was a huge mess when all the countries in the room heard a strange grinding noise, like gears rubbing against one another.

England stopped strangling France and paled. "No. No, no, no. He can't be here, no, no, no."

America looked at him and laughed. "Whatcha scared of, old man?"

"It's him."

"Who?"

"The Doctor."

"Doctor Who?"

"That's the question, now isn't it?"

Then, a blue police box materialized.

"Dude! That looks like the box from that sci-fi show you like so much."

"That's because it is from that show, and many of your citizens enjoy it as well."

France wrinkled his nose. "There's now accounting for your tastes."

"Shut up, Frog. He's very dangerous. He replaced one of my bosses with only six words."

"But I thought he was one of the good guys," America protested.

"He is, in a way. Now shush, the door is opening."

Which indeed it was. The door opened, revealing three people. One was a rather attractive redhead, which when France started to drool, England said, "Watch it, wanker. She's married to the skinny bloke not wearing a bow-tie. He can be vicious when he wants to be, especially when it comes to his wife."

There was the skinny one, dressed in rather normal clothes, then there was a slightly taller man who was wearing a bow-tie. The bow-tie man seemed to be the leader of the group, but even then, he had a childish atmosphere that reminded all the countries of America. "Ah. Well. There are a few more of you than I expected. England, what are all these chaps doing here? I was hoping we could have a little chat before I save the world."

England glared at the man. "You were exiled decades ago. Leave. Now."

"Well, about that, I can't really do that."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm saving you. Well, actually, I'm saving the world. So, Mr. Kirkland, who are these fine chaps, and what are they doing here? I thought I told UNIT to notify you."

England grimaced. "Right. About that. These are the personifications of the rest of the world. And UNIT notified me, but they," he gestured to the room, "have a habit of showing up even when told not to, like someone else I know."

The Doctor grinned. "So this lot is just like you?"

England nodded wearily. Just then, the other man decided to speak up. "Sorry, but, who is he?"

The Doctor looked back at him and exclaimed, "Oh! Right! You lot don't know he exists!"

There was a faint murmur from England, but, as usual, the Doctor ignored all protests and continued. "This, Ponds, is the United Kingdom of Great Britain and northern Ireland."

"Doctor, that's impossible. The UK is a country, a landmass, not a person."

"On the contrary. It's not impossible, just highly unlikely. This is indeed the personification of your home and native land. He's even older than I am." He turned to England. "How old are you now, old chap?"

"That's none of your business," snapped England. "Now, why are you here?"

"I'm saving the world."

"Why do you need to talk to me to do that?"

"Can't I just say hello like a normal person without you reading into it?"

"No. Because you always have a reason. You never just show up."

The Doctor sighed. "Alright, you know me too well. I'm here to ask for your cooperation. I know how much it hurts you when your people start dying, and I want to warn you that more people are likely to die, but there is also a small chance that when I'm done, everyone will come back, and I don't want you dying from shock, since that would be bad."

England rolled his eyes. "I assure you, Doctor, I shall be quite alright. I'm far more durable than even you, Time Lord."

"Which brings me to my next question, that you have yet to answer. What are you, really? Your DNA yielded no satisfactory results."

"My DNA!? When did you get that?"

"That one time when we were fighting against the Daleks and you got injured. I took the liberty of sampling some of your blood."

"Wanker," England muttered.

"So?"

"So what?"

"What are you?"

"I don't rightly know. We were just born and we just are. Nobody knows."

"Dude! Are you gonna introduce us, or what?"

"Shut it, America."

"So, that's America. Frankly, I'm not surprised."

"Hello, Doctor Who! I'm the Hero!"

England grimaced. "Fine, fine. Introduce yourselves, if you like."

The countries went around and introduced themselves as the Doctor watched with excitement and the other two watched in slight disbelief. The Doctor grinned. "These are the Ponds. Amy and Rory. And this is my TARDIS."

They both waved, but Rory glared at France, America, Prussia, and Spain as they eyed Amy.

"Well. That's that, so come along Ponds!"

With that, the strange man called the Doctor went back inside his blue police box, followed by the Ponds. With that strange grinding noise, the box faded from the room, leaving the countries staring at a blank wall, exchanging confused glances as they waited for someone to recover from the event. America, as could be expected, was the first to speak. "Dude! He could be my sidekick! Heroes always need awesome sidekicks!"

Everyone face-palmed and the meeting returned to its usual disorder. A few moments later, all the people were supposedly dead or dying, came back and that was the end of it. The cubes were disposed of and life returned to normal, and everyone pretty much forgot about the strange man in the blue box who saved the world. However, England didn't forget and decided that he would revoke the exile on the Doctor, not that it had done much good in the first place. He then went to UNIT headquarters and requested the Doctor's files. They didn't have them, and as England left the building, he smiled as he thought about the mad man with a blue box, who didn't exist.

* * *

**Although I love the attention, before you review, keep this in mind: Yes, I know the Doctor does not usually take DNA samples. It is a bit out of character for him, but I would not put it past him. So please stop mentioning it. I've had several people mention it and I know that it is a bit outside his normal methods, but I think that, if he was really, really curious about it, he would help himself. And it's not like he held England down to get one, he just picked up some extra DNA that was no longer in England's possession. So please stop mentioning it. **


End file.
